My book of poetry, "Stripping- My fight to find Me" is a story of the triumph of the human spirit. It is a story of our deep need for connection and the infinite power of love to heal.

Hello,
I am energy. I am infinity. But I am also a poet, author, artist. wife, mother, sleep doctor, and attachment and complex childhood trauma survivor. I healed only when I understood I was broken, not a victim. I learnt that everything I needed was within me. And that my inner life was the essence and driving force of my existence.

Where did Self Love Self Care First® come from?


I needed to find meaning in my suffering so I kept thinking, “What truth did I come out of this journey with? How can I share what I know in forms other than what I receive through my poetry? What is the most foundational and fundamental truth about human existence that I discovered to be true in my suffering? That is where SLSCF® comes from.

I discovered that if we do not know our truth, we cannot love ourselves. The pain and suffering of our lives, the false external messages about life, success and achievement that we receive, and the projections and imposed expectations of others we are subjected to, mangle our truth, distract us from our destined path, and cut deep into our body, mind, and soul. They cause us to not pay attention to ourselves, and to how we live our lives. These feelings and beliefs descend into our unconscious and become habitual patterns that hijack our lives.

SelfLoveSelfCareFirst® is the journey of truthful self-examination and acceptance of our truth. Only when we are ready to find value, love, and compassion for our true selves do we begin to live free.

This blog is a celebration of love, stillness, growth, joy, discovery, and the truth. The conversation is honest, the topics are varied, the perspectives are from many angles, but the common thread weaving the discussions together is Self Love Self Care First®.

You are not moving towards any light. There is no light out there. It is inside you. You must move inwards- not outwards to look for it. No one can guide you there. Only you can give yourself the permission to embark on this journey. Only you can reclaim yourself.

Your freedom is in your hands.

Sunita

Friday, August 2, 2019

Our Intuition Recognizes 'Strangers' as Our Soul Friends - The Story of The Zen Bowl




Hello,
It's Sunita here.

It was the summer of 2014. 
We were in Seattle on the last day of vacation. Our flight back to Newark was not until 11 pm that night. We were slightly at odds on how to spend the day. Having energetically and enthusiastically checked off many tourist musts in the Pacific Northwest over the past couple of weeks, we were in a place of 'now ready to get back home'. Something ambitious was not appealing. However, the thought of doing nothing and spending the day resting in our hotel room was not what we had in mind either. So we found a comfortable middle ground. After breakfast, we decided to leisurely explore Seattle's First Avenue.

As we walked down the vibrant, bustling artery of Seattle's urban landscape, we dipped in and out of shops, visited the Seattle Art Museum and ate our share of creative fare offered by the gourmet eateries along the way. And of course, drank coffee. Lots of it. It was now approaching the time to get to the airport.

As we were walking back to our hotel, I noticed a store. I passed it, but could not ignore something that was buzzing around me. I went back and looked at the display. It was an art gallery named Ventri. 

It looked expensive. I did not need anything from there. We had no time to waste as we had a flight to catch. My husband and daughters were certainly not interested in going into one more store at this point. Let alone an art gallery...

I walked away. My common sense and logic prevailed. Yet, I somehow felt uneasy about my decision. Feeling guilty about holding everyone up and possibly causing a delay, I hesitated a bit but then decided to turn back and enter the world of Ventri. As I had suspected, it was full of exquisite art, mostly glass, and wildly beyond any budget I would have had for a 'parting gift' from our trip. I wandered upstairs to the Chihuly Exhibit. In contemplation, I quietly admired the artistry and imagination of this great artist.

But I still felt a pull to something unknown, somewhere else in the store. As I was making my way to exit the store, my eyes landed on a glass bowl. I stopped. This was it! It was what I was meant to see. An instantaneous purchase was made, paid for and packed for the flight back home. Somehow, unexplainably, in that moment, I felt a clear calmness.

It was weeks after getting home that I found time to read the information that Ventri had enclosed with my glass bowl. I learned that it was the art of Scott Fitzel from Hawaii. And that there was an entire line of Zen glass bowls that he made, based on the chakras that we inhabit. All, very much in synergy with my interest in meditation and energy fields. I reached out to Scott directly and started to collect his Zen Bowls. I would also gift them to friends and family on special occasions. Scott and I would email back and forth. Pleasant enough and cordial.

Until last year when he learned about my poetry and my journey of healing. That is when we both realized that we had met before. 

Aloha Sunita,
... 
I was compelled to put off all the crazy busyness of this Friday morning and watch and absorb completely the conversation of you speaking of your work. I felt almost as if we were in the same room and you were in conversation with me and I was answering back to you
 ... 
Thank you for living for truth, growth and sharing and thank you for finding me all those years ago-otherwise I likely would not have found you now...
Me ke aloha
Mahalo nui loa
Scott

The fact is that Scott had found me years ago. When his soul whispered to me as I walked the streets of Seattle. I am so grateful that I paid attention to my intuition and surrendered to it, allowing me to be led to something unknown.Trusting that it was part of a plan. And in that, I reconnected to a soul friend. Even after this connection was made, it took me awhile to recognize Scott.

Now, Scott and I catch up ever so often in a manner that is deep, meaningful and familiar. I see him through his sculptures and his words and I feel he sees me through my poetry and words.Our creativity was the bridge that brought us back together. We recognize each other from before. Our communication is without pretense. It is full of vulnerability and share. 

We are still to meet in person but don't feel the compulsion or urgency to do so in order to solidify our friendship. It is already there. It existed before we knew each other. It will remain after we are gone.

I share a photograph of a sculpture that Scott and his partner KC Grennan recently designed, and his words that describe their vision and intent. 



"Here is a photo of a piece that Kc and I finished recently for the Hapuna Hotel on Hawaii Island. It's called Ao Lani Wai Lani. Translates closely but not heaven in the Bible context to 'Pure light from heaven, sacred water from heaven'. The gathering bowl below is alo a place to gather, sit and look up and out at the sunset and endless blue."

Have you felt such an intuition? Did you listen to your inner voice and follow it's track to discover a soul friend? Did you ignore your intuition and regret it?

I'd love to hear from you about your experiences.

We have a guide inside us who is wiser than our conscious awareness. But to be able to hear it, we must do the work to cut down on the noise, doubt and fear that we collect along the way of our journey. Only then can we connect to the infinity that we inhabit. And be led to our soul friends.The joy of discovering our souls companions, connecting to their energy and inspiration and being in harmony with them is what our journey is all about.

There is no one who writes about this more exquisitely and tenderly than John O' Donohue. I encourage you to read Anam Cara. You will quickly see how it becomes a companion book that you will want to keep with you at all times and gift to your loved ones.

I thank you Scott- for being a soul friend to me and bringing great beauty to my life through your art, your words and your spirit. I look forward to seeing you in Hawaii someday in the near future!

Wishing everyone a week of light,
Aloha,
Sunita


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